Working my way through the huge pile of physical mail that accumulated during my trip, I found the usual door-to-door ads. There's the one psychic who promises immediate results, while the other psychic guarantees results. Always a difficult choice. Sometimes they're just plain funny, like this one advertizing a Clean Mistress. I just hate dirty mistresses.

Of course, poor English is not limited to door-to-door mailings. There's this sign at Schiphol airport here in Amsterdam. The Dutch never understand why this is hilariously funny (or threatening, depending on how sadistic you think the airport authorities are.)